Stop looking outside of yourself for value
All i am saying here is a reminder for myself too. By telling you what it is, i remind myself what it is. So that, we can all learn together.
Many of you would have been with a guy who seems alright and just nice for yourself. Yes, you may be really amazing as a person for him. You encourage all of his endeavours, all his dreams, goals and passion. He tells you that he needs you because you are supportive, and it is only wih your support, he can achieve more. Thats the kind of guy that many of us will wish for, so why not right. Give it a try.
Yes you did. Even if he said you were not enough, you still stayed on. He went on finding other girls. He gave up on you. Then, he made you give up on everything.
Suddenly, you would have felt crushed. He calls you selfish because you dont understand him, all his needs. He hurt you so badly, and it goes beyond the ordinary loving squabbles. It becomes so hard to save anything anymore. You feel you are the only one in this biased relationship. Whats for two, down to one. You are the only one left – yourself in love; self love.
You feel like you want to stop. Stop what made you happy. Stop doing the gym stuff, the dancing, drawings, travelling. Everything. Because you feel like you cant make anyone happy at all. You feel worthless. I mean, you put in so much of effort to grow and be a strong girl to be useful to a man who wants to build his life no matter how he had been crashed before in his past. But he cant see that. And yu cannot make him see that. You know what you can provide for him. He cannot see that.
You have so much of power. But you cant do anything with it at all. You drift away from him
But do you know? It is in points like this, that you are tested of your own inner strength? How strong are you? Did you build all that of yourself only to give up for someone else just like that? This is exactly the test for self-love. Self first. Then love.
Someone once told me that self-love sound selfish. I replied: self-love can never be selfish. It is only because you love yourself, you can help another person grow and be successful. Can you imagine if your coach did not develop himself into a reliable and successful coach, will you be with him to achieve your own goals?
Self-love saves you from hurt. Thats the only thing that you can hold on to
Some people come into your life to give you this test. So don’t be too disheartened. Soon, you will realise that fortunately you didnt fail in that test. He just didnt love himself enough. One day he will get there, when he learns to love himself. Everyone is on a life journey of self-love for sure.
Self-love beyond self love. Self-love to save yourself from a love that only you are fueling for (self love). So now, go on and continue with that squats. You’rw almost there 💜